walking, one day at a time.

the proposal :)

2009-08-17T15:38:00.002-04:00

i have some fun news to share with you...chip and i are engaged!!! he proposed last week, on June 29th! we just got back from our big student winter conference and it's been quite a whirlwind! he proposed on monday, we left on wednesday, and now we're back and it's still sinking in. :)

i would so love to tell you in person, but this will have to do for now. now for the story...and it's detailed for those of you who love that. :)

so, back in May, chip asked if we could have breakfast together on the morning of June 29th. then a few days later when we were sitting in staff meeting, he leaned over and flicked to that day in my planner - he was going to write it in if i hadn't yet, but i already had it down. :) i thought it was a bit odd that he was planning a date a month in advance - he is a planner, but not usually that far ahead! so, my curiosity was peaked, but the end of the semester was really full & i didn't have heaps of time to think about it.

then, the week before the 29th, i went to the Cook Islands with Tina Bufkin, my campus director's wife. i actually won the trip through my bank here!! who wins a trip to a tropical island?! i mean, really?? :) it was such a gift from the Lord & tina and i really enjoyed time to rest. chip took advantage of that week to go into detail planning mode. :) i was starting to be more curious, and even told tina that i wondered if something was happening on monday. she did an excellent job of encouraging me not to assume anything & that chip probably just wanted to have a special date & quality time after i was away, and before we went to conference. i agreed that she was probably right - and i didn't want to constantly be expecting him to propose every time we were together & then be disappointed. so i determined to enjoy whatever he had planned & asked the Lord to help me wait! but i still wondered if we were going ring shopping or something out of the ordinary. :) however, when we got back from Rarotonga, i had an email from Jen and Eve asking me to start looking at rings & send them ideas...so i was convinced that chip didn't have the ring yet and was just starting to look & talk to them about what i liked!

so that morning he picked me up & said, "surprise! we're going on a scavenger hunt!" now, i love scavenger hunts & he knows this. we did one for my birthday, the day after he moved to NZ. so this wasn't entirely out of the ordinary. i figured he had just planned a fun, special date so we could have quality time before conference. he gave me a homemade puzzle piece that had the first clue & an adjective describing me. the clue led us to one of our favorite cafes for breakfast - the place of our first breakfast after chip came to NZ! after breafkast, the rest of the clues led us around hamilton to places where we've either had significant conversations, or fun memories, etc. it was a rainy, dreary morning & i felt bad that it was raining on his scavenger hunt! but it was still quite enjoyable. :) the last couple clues led us to Caimbridge, a small, quaint town just outside hamilton. he stopped to go to the "bathroom" - he did go, but also called Darin Bufkin (our campus director) & put the ring in his pocket!

we went outside & he gave me the second to last clue. by this point, i realized that the pieces had a photo of us blown up on one side, and it was spelling a larger message on the other. i looked at this piece & realized that what i thought was spelling "te adoro", which means "i adore you" in Spanish (chip has said this to me often - when we first started dating he told me he wasn't going to say "i love you" unless he was following it up with a proposal. he wanted it to mean commitment and save it for that. so cool!) so, this puzzle piece had an "A" and part of an "m"...i remember vaguely thinking that while i don't know spanish super well, i knew that the word for love in French is "amour", and spanish is similar! at this point i'm starting to be confused, because i was sure he didn't have the ring yet! so, i was still telling myself that he wasn't proposing. it must say something else!!

from there, we walk across the street & down into a park where we had one of our first big conversations about marriage & future. he directs us to a specific spot by the lake & we put down the blanket. i was SO curious now. it's raining, and we ate breakfast not too long ago. were we having a picnic?! i had no idea what was going on! we sit down & starting putting the puzzle together - he also turned my legs to face a certain direction and i thought it was a bit odd, but then figured he just wanted me next to him or something. when we finish the puzzle, it was on the photo side, & it's one of my fav photos of us. then we flip it over and it says "te amo"...i think i was just staring, trying to register if that really said i love you, and as i'm doing that, chip stands up & starts to help me up. then he starts talking & said that he really liked me. i said, "i like you too!" and gave him a hug. :) haha. he puts his hands on my arms and pulls me away so we're looking at each other again - he was serious and had a serious message to get out. ;) then he starts talking about this year and how he has learned so much & that he cares deeply for me. and he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. he starts getting down on one knee & says "i love you" while pulling the ring out of his pocket. i'm just shocked now and say, "is this for real?!" and then, "oh my gosh!" then i realize that he just said, "will you marry me?" and is now holding the ring by my finger, waiting for my answer! :) i almost continued exclaiming, but realized that i couldn't keep him hanging & said, "yes, yes!" as he gets up and hugs me, he points over to the woods across the lake, where i see Darin & Tina jumping up & down & waving. they had hidden to take photos of the event! darin was even decked out in camouflage! they ran over to congratulate us & i was still so shocked!! the Bufkins had asked me to babysit that night so they could have a date night before conference. i realized i probably was never supposed to babysit - chip had them ask me so i wouldn't plan anything that night. :)

from there we went back to his house, had a light lunch that he had ready & skyped our families. we went out for a nice dinner & then afterwards he asked if we could stop by the Bufkins to get some photos from that morning. at this point, i did not believe we were just going for photos. i was starting to catch on with all of these surprises...:) we arrive & see that chip had gathered our staff team, some friends from church & around hamilton. we celebrated with cheesecake & showed them the photos from the morning. so fun! one other fun detail is that on June 29th a year ago, while we were at Xtrack, chip decided before the Lord that he was going to pursue me. 3 days later he asked me out on our first date! so, the day he proposed was a significant date, but i didn't know it until he told me!

so that's how it happened! with conference the week after, we decided to just enjoy being engaged & didn't plan any details for a little while. but we'll definitely keep you posted! right now, we're looking to come back to the states this NZ summer (US winter) & we're getting married on December 12th. i can hardly believe it...sometimes this is still quite surreal! :) we would be so grateful for your prayers as we plan & prepare. for wisdom as we plan when to come home for the wedding in relation to the campus schedule, & that we will walk closely with the Lord & exalt Him in this season!
i'll post some photos of the proposal, so check back soon!

thank you so much for your love, prayers & encouragement. each of you are such a blessing in my - and now our - lives! we look forward to hopefully SEEing you soon!!!

tune in update!

2009-03-11T22:53:00.002-04:00

today at waikato uni, we saw a student pass from death to life! andrew made a decision with chip and ryan (both teammates of mine...and chip is also my boyfriend:) to give his life to Christ!! praise God! please pray for andrew!

we got 2400 cards from the Tune In campaign last week, and of those we are able to follow up 1400 with one on one conversations, many of which will include the gospel! and 900 of those people indicated that they would like to talk more with someone about knowing God! we are now in the process of following up these cards...meeting with students on campus throughout the day to give them a Tune In magazine (filled with articles, people's stories - all things relevant to uni students, like sex/relationships, success/studying, and questions about life and God). the articles and stories all easily allow for transitions into the gospel as we ask students if they've ever heard that they can have a relationship with God. many of them have NEVER heard that they can be in relationship with their loving, sovereign, holy Creator!

also, darin and i were able to share the gospel with the girl who won the iPod. she had never heard it before! we're meeting with her again on friday (tomorrow) to talk more about God and some reasons why we can know that He exists. pray for Alicia!

thanks heaps for praying and being part of God changing lives of university students in New Zealand!!!!

tune in

2009-02-25T01:38:00.003-05:00

students moved into the halls today at Waikato uni!

we spent the morning helping first year students move into their respective rooms in the halls on campus. it was fun to see all the wide-eyed first years and their parents, making the transition to uni life away from home. i am excited to hopefully get to talk more with many of these women! then, tonight we had an opportunity to give away free cups full of vouchers (coupons) for area businesses, lollies (candy) and our Tune-in survey in all the halls at dinner time. the Lord has given us favor with the hall directors and they see us as a positive presence on campus and in their halls. one even told us "the more students that get involved with you, the easier my job is!" praise God! we're the only Student Life movement on NZ campuses that is allowed in the halls - this is a huge blessing! the cups are a fun way to welcome students to campus, serve them, and right at the start of the year let them know who we are and that we care about them!

so, tonight the students were given the cups at the start of dinner, then we made an announcement asking them to take a quick minute and fill out the survey and turn it in. then we did an immediate drawing for a $50 cash prize. this is a super strategic way to get contact details for the 1200 first year students that live on campus!! the survey has 4 short questions asking if they would like more info about Student Life, do they have questions about God and are they wondering where they stand spiritually, and would they life more info on various aspects of uni life: studying, relationships, etc. then we follow up the cards of the students that are keen to talk more and we're able to have awesome conversations in which many of them hear the gospel!

and check out the Tune-in website! www.tunein.co.nz when classes start next week, we'll have tables set up around campus for students to fill out the surveys and enter to win a drawing for an iPod nano. this is the website they'll visit to enter to win.

please pray for the first years as they're beginning their uni career! pray for conversations we will have as a result of following up the tune-in surveys, and pray that God is softening and opening the hearts of these students to know Him. pray that they are ready to hear and trust Christ. pray that the partying and other "comforts" are empty and dis-satisfying to them. and pray that the Lord will raise up students who want to multiply their lives and influence their peers for Christ!

also, please pray for our team. we're all quite tired and seem to be experiencing some spiritual warfare - the evil one definitely does not want us sharing Jesus on campus!! please pray that we are feeding daily on God's word and loving one another and the students out of our relationship with Christ.

thank you SOOO much for your prayers!!!!! it is incredibly encouraging knowing that you are all in this with me, battling for the souls of university students in New Zealand! more prayer requests, updates and photos to come!

I AM

2008-11-24T05:36:00.003-05:00

I rediscovered this song the other day & just had to share it with you! such precious truths... What comfort and peace and joy is found in the real knowledge of our God! I long to be changed by knowing His love more deeply. Will you pray with me that I will remain in Christ? Because He alone is truth.

"Oh gently lay your head
Upon my chest
And I will comfort you
Like a mother while you rest
The tide can change so fast,
But I will stay
The same through the past,
The same in future, same today

I am constant; I am near
I am peace that shatters all your secret fears
I am holy; I am wise
I'm the only one who knows your heart's desires
Your heart's desires

Oh weary, tired and worn,
Let out your sighs
And drop that heavy load you hold
Cause Mine is light

I know you through and through;
There's no need to hide
I want to show you love
That is deep and high and wide

Oh gently lay your head
Upon my chest
And I will comfort you
Like a mother while you rest"

~Jill Phillips

Jesus, Lover of my soul

2008-11-21T06:38:00.002-05:00

"it's all about You, Jesus. and all this is for You. for Your glory and Your name. it's not about me, as if You should do things my way. You alone are God, and i surrender."

it's really happening!!!

2008-09-15T11:43:00.003-04:00

this time in two weeks i'll be flying over the pacific ocean on my way to New Zealand. to live. and be on staff with campus crusade/tandem ministries. crazy!! i've been waiting & preparing & looking toward this day for SUCH a long time. and now it's almost here. it feels very surreal! i'm excited. really excited. and about a million other things too. :)

God is good. He has guided & led me so tenderly & purposefully over the past 2 years since coming home from STINT. it's incredible to look back on all that He has done. i never could have imagined what these past few years would look like, but now in hindsight, it's an amazing sight to see. it wasn't all easy. in fact, much of the past 2 years have been just plain hard. but i wouldn't trade any of it. in fact, it was in those hard seasons that i experienced the most precious fellowship with the Lord. He has shown me new depths of His faithfulness & great treasures in His word. He has given me a beautiful picture of true community. He has helped me truly believe & know that He is good, that He does not withhold from us. He has uncovered sin in my heart & reminded me of the unparalleled beauty of the gospel. He has taught me all over again that my hope is Jesus; He is my life.

as i prepare to move to NZ, will you please pray with me that my heart will treasure Christ above all things? may He alone be my portion & my very great Reward.

"O taste and see that the Lord is good; how blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him! O fear the Lord, you His saints; for to those who fear Him there is no want. The young lions do lack and suffer hunger; but they who seek the Lord shall not be in want of any good thing." ~Ps. 34:8-10

real Life

2008-09-05T13:24:00.003-04:00

"The prodigal was never safer than when he was driven to his father's bosom, because he could find sustenance nowhere else. Our Lord favours us with a famine in the land that it may make us seek after himself the more. The best position for a Christian is living wholly and directly on God's grace-still abiding where he stood at first-"Having nothing, and yet possessing all things." Let us never for a moment think that our standing is in our sanctification, our mortification, our graces, or our feelings, but know that because Christ offered a full atonement, therefore we are saved; for we are complete in him. Having nothing of our own to trust to, but resting upon the merits of Jesus-His passion and holy life furnish us with the only sure ground of confidence. Beloved, when we are brought to a thirsting condition, we are sure to turn to the Fountain of Life with eagerness."
~from a commentary on blueletterbible.org

a few praises & prayer requests

2008-08-02T14:59:00.002-04:00

this past week i was so excited to see the Lord answer prayer & bring me to 90% of my monthly financial goal! thank you for praying!! my remaining monthly need is just $450 - we are SO close! also, my remaining special needs expenses are about $2000 for this first year, & another $2000 for years 2 & 3. i recently spoke with my support coach about setting a departure date & we're in the midst of sorting that out. he would like to see a bit more of my special needs come in, and for me to be a little closer with the monthly amount, before purchasing a ticket.

will you please pray for wisdom as i continue conversations with my coach, the international campus staff (ICS) coordinators, & my campus director in NZ? pray for wisdom as we discuss timing. pray that we will hear from the Lord, that i will submit to Him first & their leadership as well.

the NZ unis are currently in the middle of their second semester - school ends October 17th. it's fairly crucial that i arrive before the semester ends - our women's ministry is particularly affected as the 2 current American STINT girls will be returning to the US, & the other kiwi staff woman will be preparing for & gone on a summer project to East Asia. my team is praying i can be there asap to begin building relationships with the female students before the end of the school year. this will make a big difference in transitioning into our summer ministry & using the summer as a strategic time to cast vision for & develop our student leaders for the coming school year. then, i will be helping to lead our summer bible study along with two other kiwi staff guys from my team.

so, with that said, i am so grateful for your continued prayers. the Lord is teaching me heaps about waiting on Him...i know that His timing is perfect. i look back over this past year & see countless examples to confirm that fact. but right now it's a challenge to truly believe & take Him at His word. to put faith into action. please pray that i seek the Lord first, that i am quick to recognize & take captive to Christ thoughts that breed worry & fear & anxiety in my heart. His word is pure & trustworthy. pray that i fill my mind with His truth & feed daily on His faithfulness.

"trust in the Lord & do good. dwell in the land and feed on His faithfulness." Ps. 37:3

learning to ask the Father

2008-07-28T13:25:00.003-04:00

"Whether we like it or not, asking is the rule of the kingdom - 'Ask and ye shall receive.' It is a rule that never will be altered in anybody's case. Our Lord Jesus Christ is the elder brother of the family, but God has not relaxed the rule for Him. Remember this text: Jehovah says to His own Son, 'Ask of Me, and I will give Thee the nations for Thine inheritance, and the uttermost parts of the earth for Thy possession.' If the Royal and Divine Son of God cannot be exempted from the rule of asking that He may have, you and I cannot expect the rule to be relaxed in our favor. God will bless Elijah and send rain on Israel, but Elijah must pray for it. If the chosen nation is to prosper, Samuel must plead for it. If the Jews are to be delivered, Daniel must intercede for it. God will bless Paul, and the nations shall be converted through him, but Paul must pray. Pray he did without ceasing: his epistles show that he expected nothing except by asking for it. If you may have everything by asking, and nothing without asking, I beg you to see how absolutely vital prayer is, and I beseech you to abound in it. "
~C.H. Spurgeon

timing.

2008-07-14T00:43:00.002-04:00

this seems to be the big question ringing in my ears as of late. when will i reach 90% in order to buy a plane ticket? when will i leave for nz? when, when, when...

today it's been difficult to trust the Lord with timing. or maybe it's really trusting Him with the fact that i don't know. and i want to know. i am so easily convinced that i should have it figured out. but i don't. please pray that i just keep seeking Jesus. for He doesn't merely lead the way.

He is the Way.

x-track

2008-06-09T00:17:00.002-04:00

day 1.

12 hours after entering the st. louis airport, i arrive at our summer "home". it's an AWESOME apartment!! already, such a gift from the Lord and an answered prayer: our living space is restful & refreshing, with room to spread out and just "be".

and as for today and the storm delays that "threw us off" schedule...well, i think maybe the Lord just wanted me to sit in one place for awhile, and get my heart ready.

one quick prayer request: every major physical injury from the past 5 years seem to be suddenly flaring up...the Starbucks wrist, a root canal/crown from years ago, my knee, and lower back. i don't know if this is spiritual warfare, or a test from the Lord...either way, please pray for healing/relief, but ultimately that i will have a thankful heart and lean into the Lord! thank you!!

and we're off...

2008-06-03T01:02:00.005-04:00

well, as i'm packing up things in the apartment and preparing to leave for x-track this weekend, i figure it's about time to start updating! as of this evening, the Lord brought my monthly financial support to 86%!! $637/month to go. yay! 82% was the last thing i knew when i went to sleep the night before...and yet, He was not surprised by the new support that came in today. so why was i?? He knew all along. He is faithful.

and yet, i struggle to believe. in fact, my deceitful heart is prone to unbelief. which is why sometimes, like today, i am overwhelmed with gratitude for the Lord's goodness. Lord, help my unbelief! He is always the provider, always merciful, always holy, always good, always love, always steadfast, always faithful, always just. if He treated me as i deserve i wouldn't be here today. my life is as a blade of grass: here today, gone tomorrow, and no one even remembers its place. and still, He knows me. He knows my frame. He knows I am but dust. and as a Father, He has compassion on His children.

what a beautiful God.

testing...1...2...3!

2007-09-28T10:31:00.000-04:00

this is a test! let's see how this thing works...